A few days ago, I got an email from Donna (one of my mission companions) telling me about her friend, Ashley, who just lost her first born son (the same way that we lost Isaac). Although I don’t know Ashley, my heart aches for her, as memories of our loss (a year and ½ ago) come flooding back to me. The past couple of days (since I heard the news), I’ve been thinking a lot about the series of events that led up to the passing of our son, and the days, weeks, and months following. I can remember holding Isaac’s cold little body in my arms, sobbing, and thinking “how can I go on with life?” I also recall feeling like I would never be able to laugh, or even smile, ever again.
I feel for Ashley, and her husband, because I imagine they are experiencing similar feelings and emotions at this time. As I look back over the past year, I can see how I was able to get through that particular trial, and yes, even laugh and smile along the way! I know we couldn’t have done it without the love and support of our families, our dear friends, and others that had been through similar experiences. I know we couldn’t have done it without the Gospel of Jesus Christ and our testimonies of the Savior and his Atonement. I know we wouldn’t be where we are today had it not been for the comforting power of the Holy Ghost…who literally carried us from one hour to the next. I have been so blessed this past year with a greater love for my Heavenly Father and my Savior. I feel closer to them now than ever before. I have been blessed with a beautiful daughter, Ruby, who is an Angel, and the joy of my life. I know that when the Lord asks us to sacrifice something (in our case, our son…and in Ashley’s case, her son) he will always give back “an hundred fold”. I rejoice in this principle, and know that the Lord always keeps his promises. I know that He will bless Ashley and her husband (as he has us) in the upcoming days, weeks, months, and even years. My thoughts and prayers are with Ashley, her husband, and Baby Joshua at this time.