little lemon

dear baby,

we've made it 14 weeks! that's something to celebrate, for sure. so i guess now you're the size of a lemon. which i think is strange because i've never seen a lemon that was bigger than a peach (week 13). i know that you're not getting any smaller though. here's proof. just take a look at this belly of mine.



if i look a little nervous in this photo, well, it's because i am. today's our big surgery day. it's the day the doctors are going to stitch mommy up good and tight so that you won't come any earlier than you're supposed to. that's what happened to our poor baby isaac. mommy's body thought he was ready to come, and her cervix was fully dilated at only five months. he was born just a couple of weeks later. this may all be a bit much for you right now, but it's not important that you understand everything just yet. what really matters, is that what is about to happen in just a little over two hours, is going to save your life...and make me the happiest mommy in the whole wide world. i'm feeling a lot of things right now. but mostly just nervous and sick. nervous because when i had this surgery with ruby, it was really hard on me...physically. i had to be down for two weeks afterwards. we're definitely hoping and praying for a quicker recovery this time around. especially because i have your brother and sister to care for. and sick, really sick, because our surgery isn't until 3:00, and they told me that i couldn't eat or drink anything for 8 hours prior. last time I had anything was at 7 this morning. Your daddy set his alarm for 6:30 to make me some oatmeal, a protein shake, and a nice cold bottle of water to drink. He is such a kind and tenderhearted man. you'll soon find out just how wonderful he truly is. I guess that's a bit off the subject, though. back to the sick part. i'm sick because, well, first of all, asking a pregnant lady to go without food for that long, especially in the middle of the day, is just asking for trouble. and you should never expect any arizonan - pregnant or not - in august, 112 degrees today mind you, to go 8 hours without water...that's just plain ludicrous (unless you're fasting, of course...then I think u get a little added strength from above). my mouth feels like cotton, my stomach is in knots, my nerves are off the charts...but you know what? it's worth it. i would go through any discomfort, any pain, any sickness, torment, fear, sadness, or anxiety...for you, and for your comfort and safety. and i mean that from the very depths of my heart. i wish you the best in surgery, my love. we're both going to need some prayers from above.

i love you my little lemon,

mom