Friday, September 24, 2010

my little lentil

Dear Baby Mine,

Right now you're only about the size of a lentil. Yep, just 1/4 inch long.
How is it then, that your mommy is getting so big already?
My body is rapidly changing... my stomach is expanding, my waist is thickening.
Not looking pregnant at all, just pudgy. Like really pudgy.

It's also hard to believe that something so small could be the cause of so much worry and anxiety.
I worry about you. A lot. Maybe more than I should.
I lie awake for hours at night because of my over-anxiety for you.
It's just that we've waited so long for you, and now that you're here, well, I couldn't bear the thought of anything happening to you.
I think about you all the time, I pray for you every chance I get.
I hope you don't think I'm complaining.
I'd gladly do anything for you.
In fact, if getting you, dear baby, meant that I'd never sleep another ounce, and ended up gaining 200 pounds...well, I'd do it in a heartbeat.
For you. I would.
Speaking of heartbeats...I get to hear yours soon.
Make it strong for your daddy and me.

I love you so.



Kelly said...

this is so cute. I know the feelings. I used to pray every second and Rog and I would worry and worry. Ok, maybe just me. I used to write Cason letters all the time and I was thinking about posting one the other day... You might have given me strength to do so. :) Cant wait to hang and play. xoxo

Jon & Jenelle said...

I love your blog. i love your writing. i love your photography. i love your testimony and your strength. I stubbled across your blog from a cousins-Ive commented before i think on the post about your beautiful mother. I lost my father, so that particular post helped me. your posts always seem to make me happy. sometimes cry-a good cry.
Tonight something happend in my life and i immediately thought of you. I was sitting in the Conference Center at the Relief Society Mtg.right smack in the middle, great view, great spirit when i had a "bad mommy feeling" i looked down at my silent phone to see my husband calling. As soon as i heard the words "BITE" i was out of there.. running back in to gather my group and get out as fast as i could. My inlaws dog had bit my beautiful little 18 month baby girls face. i kept thinking about one of your posts where you were reflecting on Ruby's accident. I remember your everything turned out ok, despite a few scary infections.. and i just kept thinking how grateful i am to have stumbled across you. I'll spare your bloggers more details, but if you would could you email me any advise.. or tips you found helpful with the dog bite, they had to stich her, but im worried about infection. Thank you so much. for everything.
Jenelle ( )

Angie P said...

I'm praying for that little lentil sized baby too. I can't wait to meet him or her!

diana said...

i already love that little lentil of yours.

good post.

Elizabeth said...

That is SO exciting Nic! Congratulations!!! We're so happy for you!!!