Tuesday, July 24, 2007

baby and me...



A few weeks ago, I had a very special experience that I've neglected to record, but need to, especially while it's still somewhat fresh in my mind. I feel I need to preface by letting everyone know that Ruby is a Daddy's Girl, in every sense of the word. I'm always the one to get her out of her bed in the morning, and she'll usually greet me with a smile and a "hi", but it's not until I take her into our bedroom, to see Daddy (usually still half asleep), laying in bed, that she truly exhibits her excitement. She usually lets out a scream, followed by a very enthusiastic "daddy", all the while her arms and legs flailing in every which direction. She follows him around like a lost puppy dog while he gets ready for work, and cries uncontrollably when he leaves for the day. He's the one she reaches for when she's sad or hurt. He's also pretty much the only one that she'll cuddle with or snuggle up to...
Needless to say, this behavior has taken quite a toll on mom. I don't know if it's just that I'm the one she spends all day, every day with; and she's just so totally used to me, and bored of me; and dad's more of a novelty because he's not around as much? Or maybe she secretly has a little crush on her dad? (I wouldn't blame her on that one, he is pretty cute.) Whatever her thinking, whatever her reasoning, I'm not gonna lie, it just plain hurts. Well anyway...enough with the saga. I'm sure you just want me to get to the point of the story.
So, a couple of weeks ago, I had put Ruby down for the night, and about 10 minutes later, she just completely broke down. She was crying uncontrollably (much like she does when daddy leaves for the day), and since this was really the first time that something like that had ever happened, (usually once we put her down, she goes right to sleep, and rarely wakes up again until morning), I didn't know if I should just let her cry it out, or go in and see if I could do anything to calm her. She was probably crying for John, but he was outside working on the patio (another story for another day), so I came to the rescue. I went in, picked her up out of the crib, placed her in my arms, sat in the glider, and rocked my baby. She calmed down quickly as I began telling her a story. I told her the story of her brother, Isaac; and as I did, her eyes were locked with mine...(it was almost as if she could really understand what I was saying, and was truly and genuinely interested). I told her about when I was pregnant with him, and how he used to kick mommy so much. I told her about how mommy and daddy chose his name, and how mommy had some complications, and had to go to the hospital. I told her about how we waited patiently in that hospital room, for 9 days, hoping and praying that he could stay inside mom's tummy for just a few more days. I told her about how he was born, about how he passed, about how we got to bathe him, and hold him all night long. I told her all about his funeral. I then, told her how I felt when I found out I was expecting her, and how I just knew that Heavenly Father was sending us a girl this time. I sang her the song that we used to sing to her every night when she was in mom's tummy...

We love You-B
Ruby, Ruby
We love You-B
Our precious Little Gem


I just held her tight, and told her how special she was, and how much I loved her, and her eyes were still locked with mine. I really think in that moment, if she could have, she would have said I love you, too, mommy. But really, no words were necessary for me to feel of the love she had for me. It was a very, very sweet and tender experience that we shared together...one that will not soon be forgotten. I truly believe that the Lord sent His Spirit to abide with us, which Spirit also allowed her to understand the words I spoke; and me, to discern the feelings she felt...

7 comments:

The Lee Family said...

That is so precious. I am firm beleiver of everything yo have said. I know that the Lord gives us these moments so we know that what we are doing is amazing and important. Those sweet, tender moments are there to remind us how precious our little ones are and how important our job is as their parents to do everything we can to raise them with all they love they neeed!

Rania said...

Nic, one thing I love about you is your ability to capture a moment. I was really touched by your story. You are a wonderful mother! Ruby and Isaac are very lucky!

Kira Joy said...

Paul (my hub) and I were talking about babies just last night. It was such an interesting conversation about how close children are to God and the amazing things they would probably tell us if they only had the ability to talk. It was nice of you to point out how somehow children do communicate with us, even if it isn't in such a common way like words.

diana rose said...

great post nicole. you are an amazing mother.

Judy said...

That was a beautiful experience, Nicole. Thank you for sharing it. It reminded me of the first time I told Lori the story about Jesus. She listened so quietly liked she undestood. I realized then, what a privilege I had to teach my little daughter all about our Savior.

Danielle said...

You are a true woman of God, Nicole. I just love how you and John are such strong, good people. You're a power couple, and obviously amazing parents.

You make me want to be a mom soooooooooooooooooo badly!

Thanks for sharing!

buddens said...

Have I mentioned I like you? Well, I do, and posts like these are what make me remember that. I'm pretty sure I know you better than John now, just from blogging! Anyway, I totally agree, and have had some similar experiences with Gretta, where I just know she loves me, and I know she feels of my love for her. Great post. Thanks.